So a couple of years ago I had a job tutoring Grammar to Japanese-American 8th&9th graders. Most of them spoke decent English but had a hard time adjusting since the Japanese language does not contain many sounds that you find in English. I would assign speeches on topics of their choice for them to read in front of our group.  Here are a few of the gems. Lets start with Kohki’s (8th grade) speech.

Not bad right?

These two speeches were written by one of my 9th students, Riichi. Very mature and very pervy, as you can see. When he showed them to me I confiscated both and told him if he misbehaves again I’m going to give them to his dad. Technically I’m not really allowed to reprimand students but, if any parents or teachers think that I assigned this kind of work, I would get into some serious shit. I wasn’t mad at the kid. I actually thought they were really funny.

I <3 Engrish