peach

The Peach Complex.

 

peach
Shigeru Miyamoto
, must have been in some kind of F’d up relationship with his girlfriend. He must have gotten his heart broken and decided to make a game based on his relationship to help men around the world relate and cope. Think about it! Princess Peach is the eternal cock-tease right? and we all know the drill: Peach gets knabbed by the forever horny Bowser and you, as Mario have to drop everything and claim countless lives just to get her ungrateful ass home. Peach makes absolutely no provisions to defend herself from her persistent captor, knowing all along that we’ll clean up all her shit. To make things worse she gets your awkward brother Luigi involved and now shes dragging your family in this shit. YOUR FAM BRO!


That’s rough. Try as you might to keep her safe, it’s never enough. It’s like shes constantly throwing  challenges your way to test manhood and heart. “yeah, you saved me last week but, what have you done for me lately?”

chicks…am I right?

My game review criteria – it’s pretty damn simple

I’ve played a ton of games in my life, and I can tell you that I’ve read a lot of corresponding game reviews.  Do I trust ‘em?  No.  Like most things, you’ve gotta take what they say with a grain of salt.  Some websites need the whole fuckin’ can of Morton salt.  When it rains it most definitely pours.

I do agree that games these days aren’t too cheap, and most people are loathe to waste their money on a game that sucks.  Fair enough.  That’s the million dollar question right there.  Does the game suck?  And what criteria do you base a game’s “suckage” on?

Sites like IGN, Metacritic, and countless others have their own criteria to judge a game’s suckiness.  I say, “FUCK THAT”.  Besides, you’ve got other factors like advertisement, time constraints, and player bias clouding the review (that shit can’t be helped, really).

Here’s my criteria for a game.

IS IT FUN?  It’s a simple question that requires one of two answers.  Yes, or no.

YOU BET YOUR SWEET ASS!

YOU BET YOUR SWEET ASS!

Let’s be real, we all play videogames, watch anime, or read comics because we’re bored and we need something to pass the time.  Fuck the bullshit, if the game is fun, we’ll let you know.  Real talk.

-twitchy

Super Street Kineda II

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Had a chance to check out Kineda’s SF Hyper Collection yet? It’s signature Kineda art, plus you’re favorite Street Fighter II characters. The only thing that can top that is if they made more tee’s with SF4 characters… *cough, cough CODY…ahem.

I’m not big on graphic tee’s anymore, not since 05/06 or so but, Looking through the Kineda Store. I must admit i’m tempted to pick up a few things (I personally like the “Shoryuken” snapback). So if you’re big on Streetwear, still “hypebeasting”, a Capcom supporter, Street Fighter fanboy/girl. I suggest taking a look at the store and dropping some of that tax return money on some fresh shit.

Metal Gear Sunrising…Good Morning!

Freddie Wong. We all know who he is, we all know what he does, and we all love him. If you don’t know..shame on you (and you call yourself a nerd.)

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GOOD MORNING! waddup’ doe! some of you are starting your morning routines. and the rest of you are still asleep…lucky bastards.

Have you ever wondered what some of your favorite video game characters would do if they really existed? I’ve always wondered what Bubsy the Bobcat did in the morning…like, did he wake up and make shitty video games and beat up on Aliens that stole his balls of yarn, or did he also brush his teeth and use a men’s facial cleanser to exfoliate his skin like I do…anyway.

In this video Metal Gear’s Raiden meets Patrick Bateman (Christian Bale in American Psycho) in this showcase of slick CG wizardry with a fairly well-matched voiceover. The Certified YouTube star still manages to impress and entertain with his ongoing pillaging of video game culture and mastery of special effects software. Just when I think I’ve had enough videos showing just how hilarious it is when the constraints of a game character are brought to the fore by placing them in real-life situations, he drops this gem.

My top ten JRPG battle themes. #10.

A geek-centric post.  Haven’t done one of those in a while.  I can’t abandon our geek audience, right?  That would majorly suck.  Anywhoo, I’ve decided to count down my favorite Japanese RPG battle themes.  These were the conditions of my selections:

1. The game had to developed in Japan.
2. The game had to play during a battle/random encounter.

I sorted out my selections based on personal preference, so I’ll begin with #10.

http://ignicaeli.deviantart.com/ - sauce.

http://ignicaeli.deviantart.com/ – sauce.

10. Closed Road (B)
Composed by : Motoi Sakuraba
Featured in: Resonance of Fate (US/EU) /End of Eternity (JP)
Notes about Sakuraba-sensei from Wiki:

Motoi Sakuraba takes the baroque and melodic Japanese progressive rock of the 1980s and expands it with his own trademark complex rhythms, emotional flutes, use of male choir and heavy reverb. The lighter side of his style is a crossover between symphonic progressive rock, cinematic orchestra and new age. Sakuraba is also known for introducing many jazz-like improvisations to his music style. In recent years he has made a serious effort toward expanding his style even further.

This song features a more “rock ‘n roll” vibe, which fits really well with the frenetic gun battles of RoF. Catchy, fun, and easy to listen to, which are three necessary things for a JRPG battle song to have.  I mean, you’re gonna be hearing that song a lot.

What made #9?  Stay tuned, folks.

To all the people that think that violence in videogames incites IRL violence, I’ve got one picture for you.

I need a manicure.

I need a manicure.

This is getting ridiculous.  Since I’ve been gaming, I’ve never killed anyone, shot anyone, used Omnislash on Sephiroth, thrown hadoukens at Sakura, casted Cure on Rinoa, stomped on a goomba, killed Dracula, fought Metal Gear Rex in an abandoned missile disposal facility on Shadow Moses Island, and….

You get the picture.

There is no link between violence IRL and violence in videogames.  Can’t you people just accept that there are people that are just fucked up?  Seriously.

And as for you people that are willing to pin all the blame on videogames, if you’re willing to go so far to destroy the first amendment to protect the second amendment, then you deserve to get teabagged by a group of angry gamers jacked up on mountain dew.

I love you guys.

I love you guys.

An Anime Conji plug, among other things.

 

477750_10150661854814035_2029012070_oAnime Conji.  San Diego’s only anime convention.  You might be wondering what a small website like ours has to do with this anime convention?  Well…a few things.

For one thing, I’m one of the volunteer coordinators.  And yes, we are recruiting.  Interested?  Sound off in the comments, and I WILL RESPOND.  Serious.

The volunteer department’s mascots are named “twitchy” and “gatcha”, both named for the first volunteer coordinators.  Myself and Gail I.  GAIL!  SHOUTOUT TO YOU!  I KNOW YOU READ THIS!  THANKS SO MUCH!!

So I think you all should go to this convention and say hi to us.  Neggy and Ro will be there taking pictures and such.

And before I forget, I wanna give shoutouts to my homies that I met through Anime Conji:

  • @whitedarryl
  • @kaleionapua
  • @vince85
  • @flareboost
  • @elfgrove
  • @mgshogun
  • @richandcreamy
  • @eyemusing
  • rhythmemoti#n.net
  • @kawaii_kupo
  • @kupomatic

If you’re not gonna volunteer, you can still go.  Real talk.  Here’s the link.

 

Assassin’s Creed 3 Post-Game Write Up – If the world doesn’t end, we know who to thank.

FUCK YEAH

FUCK YEAH

Assassin’s Creed 3?  The game experience was good, but the game doesn’t hint at any closure at all.  Well, sorta.  After beating the game I felt…unsatisfied.  If they’re planning on releasing sequels to ACIII, then….

GODDAMNIT UBISOFT, STOP THAT SHIT AND JUST FINISH THE DAMN STORY!

In the end, Assassin’s Creed 2 is still my favorite out of the trilogy.  Ezio was a kickass Assassin’.

Fighters of Cap?…OMG!

I know i’m probably late to this but the word on the street is that Capcom trademarked the title ‘Fighters of Capcom‘. If you know anything about me by now, it’s probably something to do with my chronic cycle of reflection mirror/window checking or the fact that I go ape shit over anything involving Capcom. I don’t know what it is but, I love Capcom fighting games and beatem ups. I’m not any good at them but i’m usually the first to reserve them at gamestop. Let’s hope that it’s the greatest fighting game in the WORLD and NOT some turn based card system game. If my prayers for this game to be the Greatest of all time comes true, I’ll go ahead and forget about Capcom Fighting Jam. All is forgiven.

Have a PS3 or 360? ADD ME!
XBOX: MF JUSTIN
Playstation: MF_JUSTIN